me: doesn’t purchase my dream home because the street name is bad
have u ever tried to look cool in front of ur friends and u
i have been laughing at this for 10 minutes straight.
both his pants and underwear came off how did he even manage
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Typing an essay due tomorrow at 3 in the morning
basically me when i buy college textbooks
When you realize that someone is only being nice to you because they want something
Freshmen about to be in the hallways like
hey hey hey just think while you’ve been getting down and out about the liars and the dirty dirty cheats of the world you could’ve been getting down to this
let me turn off my phone so I can use it later on
*turns phone back on*
what the fuck
Ariana Grande sounds like a font on Microsoft Word
- me yesterday night : lol who needs sleep
- me today: i do. i need sleep.
- me tonight: lol who needs sleep
We’ve officially reached that annoying time of year where it’s sweater weather in the morning, but by midday you die from a heatstroke.
- shrek one: bad
- shrek two: the funniest movie i have ever seen. literally one of the funniest comedies of all time. incredible pacing and dialogue. reference jokes that were actually funny. surreal world that was so modern fantasy it actually worked. rocking score. awesome scene set to "i need a hero" being sung by the villain unironically and completely played straight. a bar of villains. just overall the best concepts ever.
- shrek three: bad
- shrek four: bad
Frankenstein enters into a body building competition and finds he has seriously misunderstood the objective